22 Sept 2011

I LOVE my radio!

Machine Boy's next 'PROPER' release...kinda thang...erm...maybe!!

A NEW law!

maybe we should have a new law!...we all HAVE to like the same crap and Simon Cowell is ruler of the whole wiiiide WORLD!

30 Aug 2011

SILENT RADIO are a bit Machine Boy!

Silent Radio have featured/interviewed Machine Boy in their 'Who Are Ya?' homepage feature...you can go read the wise/weird words of this madman HERE!

14 Aug 2011

NEW FREE EP Sky Lanes from Machine Boy!

Sky Lanes Machine Boys 2nd improvised aLIVE ep is now available completely FREE....click link below to get it plus get the pretty pictures too!!!


12 Aug 2011


David Cameron wants to get on with dishing out new 'tough swift' justice for your local rioter, apparently they will all be in & out before Big Brother starts, at one point channel 5 were worried most of their audience were gonna be banged up without TV privileges!!

7 Aug 2011

MY WIFE is a teenage twat!

tis weird..just think if we were all the same!....and we were ALL impressed by loudmouth no talent money squandering celebrity freaks....maybe we would all fancy Katy Price.......jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee​eeeeeeeez what a truly horrific thought!

5 Aug 2011

MACHINE BOY FREE EP now available!

Sky Lanes Machine Boys 2nd improvised aLIVE ep is now available completely FREE....click link below to get it plus get the pretty pictures too!!!


2 Aug 2011

wooooooooow! its a nu choon!

Sucka by Machine Boy
Machine Boy in writing a new song for Cheryl Cole SHOCK!, its called SUCKA! here's a snippet from an interview i did in this parallel universe, (question) WHY NO VOCALS?, (my answer) DON'T BE STOOPID!, (question) so whats Cheryl gonna do in the video for this new song!, (my answer) maybe we could dip here in RED RUBBER!


maybe our our ole friend David cameron might want to invest too!

16 Jul 2011

David Cameron....who!

Politicians have the moral high ground!? as they surround the press and stick the boot in!...I keep thinking, enjoy while U can cuz its a sure thing with the fools we have in charge, it won't be long before the press start dishing it out again!...I'm also glad to see that some of the things that fine laaaydy ;-) Maggie Thatcher stood ...for all those years ago are still holding strong...if somebody don't agree with U..no probs bully the crap out of em! they'll tow the line...if you can't afford something!...knick it off some other sucka!...what a fine plucky quaffered ole wench she was!...hey on a brighter note robberies are now UP....well UP apparently!! in good ole Birmingham....a pat on the back for all those fine folk who campaigned to get half a few hundred grands worth of CCTV cameras taken down in our fine fine city!....U ROCK U REALLY DO!

15 Jul 2011

ROBOCAST doin the Death Machine thang!

Machine Boy's Death Machine is now playing on that fine electronic radio show Robo Cast Radio....it is splendid....in a very splenideedo way!.


9 Jul 2011

fone dregs!

So now we know whats important!, lets tap a few murder victims phones, there's bound to be a juicy story or 2 in there!...can the press sink any lower!?...oh I'm sure they CAN!

3 Jul 2011


tis weird at one time we had the village idiot! now we have the celebrity!....

2 Jul 2011

wot the.....final!

Final (fantasy'land'mix) by Machine Boy
Just for a moment I am discovering the universe & elsewhere.....erm...apparently! back to normal soon tho I would imagine!

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! a street scene! ;-)


ok over the last cupla days I've been reading a number of stories in the 'bad' ole UK press (alway to be believed, haha, obviously!) incl. facebook 40 million dollar payoff and the mighty U2 tax scam, this amounts to enuff cash to run a fair sized country, THE GREED of PEOPLE on this planet is truly staggering!

24 Jun 2011

IN LIFE.......

Death Machine (4 min edit) by Machine Boy aLive
In life you....pay....pay...pay......and pay some more...so here's 4 little minutes of FREE Death.....speaking purely musically obviously!....a 4 minute mix of monster 14 minute track from the Machine Boy 'Village Machine' EP which is also completely FREE HERE!

18 Jun 2011

jobs jobs jobs!

Its great to be living in a country where the right people are in the right jobs....David Cameron for example!....oops sorry forget that one!

2 Jun 2011

MACHINE BOY doin his TENBOY thang!

THE NEW Tenboy ep is now available worldwide, the ep is called 'The Girl In The Moon' its 4 tracks of good acoustic based tenboy splendidness and here's a little picture of The Girl In The Moon...here's some links you can click to listen to samples and if you like it please BUY IT!


7 May 2011


jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez the whole freakin world is off its ed!....even Bin Laden did a 'last' facebook post....and he had more friends than me!!!....grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!

3 May 2011

GREG Healey 'aLive session tracks'..get em here FREE!

aLive session tracks Greg Healey Dandelion Radio Show! by Machine Boy aLive
These are a couple of LIVE (aLive) session tracks Machine Boy recorded for Greg Healey's Dandelion Radio show...you can download em FREE here! enjoy!


ok then.....you've got a nice car!....its cost you an arm & a leg!....you've probably spent more on that thing in the last few months than some country's have to keep their population alive!!!!......its all shiny, its got blacked out windows.....so I'm guessing you are as ugly as sin!...but hey you've got a GREAT car!...and yes its pr...obably true that everybody who sees you passing by, says 'wow what a lovelee car, they must be very succesful, wonderfull & hugely popular!!'....its got GO faster stripes....presumably to make you...erm....GO faster....its got a wing thing on the back....presumably....to make it fekkin fly when you come across a piece of tarmac thats not good enuff for your new white wall tyres!!!???.....so why is it that when you get into this MEAN 'MUTHA FUKKA OF A' MACHINE...you automatically turn into a COMPLETE TOSSA!.....in fact the better your car is...the bigger ARSEHOLE you become!!!.....................now for 'Comedy Sports Car's'....just don't get me on those basterd things!!!!!

27 Apr 2011

BBC6Music 'exclusive' 4 minute mix o Village Machine!

Tom Robinson has asked us to do an 'exclusive' 4 minute mix of our new FREE ep called 'Village Machine'...and he'll be playing the mix on his awesome 'Introducing' show on BBC6 Music this Sunday!...rock on!!



23 Apr 2011


its a weird thing aint it!!!.......religion!...its makes one feel good about ones'self!...something to believe in, aspire to!....love your fellow man....oooops sorry they don't allow that stuff do they!?....erm maybe it gives one a little bit of one up man'ship!...'I believe this and you don't...so I can treat you like shyte while I g...et treated like a queen (oops sorry!)...I mean A King!'....some religions do weird stuff too..speaking to little seemingly inane objects....or giving little pressies....eggs for example! and chocolate ones at that...now that IS weird & very fattening!! ;-)......now you may laff at me or even hate me for NOT being 'A Believer' but honestly I do LIKE the idea of religion! I really do!......this crap that we live thru! surely amounts to something!....its gotta.......nobody would come up with the bestest idea ever...ie life....the human race......and there not to be a point! but to me....our 'point' always has a number of things which don't sit comfortably.....a big fat slice of hatred....persecution, torture, abuse & murder!......oh yeh with a lot of war thrown in for good measure.....so yeh religion on the face of it is a TOP idea!....and yeh I kinda wished I'd have thought of it!....but surely it would just be a total none starter with our human rights people nowadays!.....mmmmmmmm.....interesting!

21 Apr 2011


Machine Boy is in EP land with 'The Happy EP' it contains a bunch of weird & wondefull mixes of 'Happy Very Happy' including a monster 16 minute mix! wow we hear you say WOW INDEED!.....you can get it from all the usual download websites such as Amazon, iTunes, HMV, Spotify etc! enjoy!
Happy Very Happy (Single Mix) by Machine Boy

19 Apr 2011

you're a twat!

I was walking down the street the other day and a girl came up to me! dunno what was wrong with her but she stunk of booze!…anyway I digress! she stood there face to face with me and she said….’you know what….you…you’re a twat!’…..I smiled trying to impress, she was quite good looking!…I smiled and said….’yeh I know’….….she said…’WHAT!’……I said ‘yeh I know’, she giggled and slurred…’did you hear what I said you fff.ffff…..fffekin knobhead…you’re a twat!’….I smiled back and said…’yeh I know, always been one babe!…..’it was weird its like she knew me…intimately!…..at this point she started waving her arms and said ‘NO NO NO! don’t agree with me…you…ffff….fekkin twat!’ to which I responded ‘but you’re a very agreeable person and may I incur, very very attractive altho the frothing from the side of the mouth I could do without!’, she smiled, turned and then punched me in the face!…..phew, glad I didn’t disagree with her!…you see!….WOMEN! you gotta know how to handle them….one up for male domination I’d say shweeeeeet!

9 Apr 2011

wayne wayne wayne!

apparently its all about that moment!....paranoia maybe!......oh forget it......who really cares anyway!

7 Apr 2011

a bit of tuneless'bint'isms!

ok then, why in this life do we give a shit about celebrities....in fact why are some people celebrities at all!?......once upon a time somebody had to actually do something to be a 'star....a celebrity'......have some talent, even if it was banging a tray on your head in time to god save the queen...yup thats talent buddy! ;-)....now...adays all people have to do is, do nothing to be ON teevee!....argue with their other alf...stuff some crap up their nose....spend money in a totally obscene manner....and all this while other people on this planet struggle for their next cup of water!.....have you ever known of a bigger waste of space than Kerry Katona...the teevee companies & execs seem to be happy to throw money and airtime at this 'person...celebrity' who's talent seems to be, being the complete height of 'nothingness'.....I can hear the teevee execs now.'ok so we need a new programme...any old shyte'l'do!....I've got this great idea...Kerry Katona....she'll completely self distruct at some point (again) soon.....and we'll have it all on camera!...yeh who wouldn't want to watch that!'.....I'm sure there's millions out there who watch this crap!.....probably mostly people who's idea of talent is being able to shag as many footballers as possible....and then sell their amazing story of spitroast heaven to some crappy newspaper....Katy Price is getting divorced again!?.........JUST FUCK OFF!

1 Apr 2011

FREE ep to download!

DOWNLOAD Machine Boy's brand spanking new EP for FREE by following the link below...its a CRACKER...and did we mention it was FREE!!!....


27 Mar 2011

uma uma uma!

I love adverts, they are the best thing in the world! much more interesting than any other shit on teevee!...I especially like the one where there's a tram crash and the corner shop gets crushed and...and.....that blokes missus who's just had that baby gets crushed to death! and then everybody else in the street comes out to see whats going on and then Ken Barlow comes out and he gets a huge piece of tram track thru his chest and then the tram which has just crashed...and is now precariously resting on the side of the bridge falls over into the street killing everybody in site, including all the emergency services people, then a bunch of terrorists in a toyota truck come trundling down the street, pick up the survivors and parade them on teevee and slowly mutilate every last one of em.....erm....what do you mean that wasn't an advert! OH! BUT IT WAS SUCKAS!.....yeh I love adverts!

20 Mar 2011

war and other wonderfull things!

ok, I know you miss those good ole days don't cha?....the sweet sweet sound of a burning ford capri, the shimmering flames, lighting up the window of a council house across a dark street...the sound of a doc martin running down our street, the crunch of broken brick against soft skull!!!....the swish of a bread knife cutting thru the crisp tear gas filled air!!.....yeh yeh I know what you're thinking at this moment......good times they be fine sir....good times!!!.....but hey you know what, I've got a feeling!....times are a changin'.....you may not need to wait much longer meatbags!......sooner than you think suckas!!!......the beautiful game..this wonderfull earth.....MY ARSE!.....WAR do we fuckin love it or what!! ;-(....happy days are here again...lala.....la....la....laaaaaaaa!!

13 Mar 2011

11 Mar 2011

this CRAZY world!

people are dying on this crazy planet and some knobhead will still be trying to hang onto power!

5 Mar 2011


Village Machine EP by Machine Boy aLive

My Life As A Teenage tit!

there's only one thing better than being a teenager and thats being a robot!...u can say & do what you like and people put it down to programming!...altho having said that!....surely its ALL just a 'simple' programming glitch....mmmm....interesting!

27 Feb 2011

MY Life As A Teenage Robort 7!

ok so I kinda understand!....l'm thinking GOD (or whoever you believe started this whole thing!) had IN & OUT trays...kinda to keep things organised in the creative process, it makes sense obviously!.....and I also realise that he had to have some evil to compensate for the good in this new universe he was creating.......so obviously he put Hitler, Mugabe, Gaddafi and that knobend who headbutted Joe Jordan the other day in the 'crazy mixed up lunatic syco fuckwit...why do they exist' tray!......but I'm at a loss what tray Katy Price & Justin Bieber would've been in! this life for sure gets weirder & weirder!!


23 Feb 2011

VILLAGE MACHINE ep download it FREE!

DOWNLOAD Machine Boy's brand spanking new EP for FREE by following the link below...its a CRACKER...and did we mention it was FREE!!!....


19 Feb 2011

My Wife Is A Frigid Robot!?

ok then so I know! its bad....I've slagged off pap'n'roll godz!!....I spose its kinda like slapping the queen in the face or (gulp!) Elton John even.....but hey whats with modern bands....one minute they wanna be taken 'seriously' then next they wanna 'just get down for the kidz'...one minute yeh we're influenced by 'real' bands then the next we wanna be like Green Day...then aaargh! Bun Jovi(!!)......then no not really! we wanna be like Boyzone & make lots of spodoolaz!...'because its nuthin serious we're just anutha band making POP musac' (sounds like a horrible re-occurring 80's nitemare to me ;-)....grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!......hehe....what happened to good honest musac!!......Lemmy for example 'Hi Lemmy you know that wooooonderfull new song by those lovely looking boyz Westlife.....you know what me ole mate!....thats what you need!, you've already got the credability now you just need a 'real' song to sell! it'll go down a storm with the kidz just what you need...buddy...pal....matey!' yeh, YOU GO TRY THAT! just don't ask me to help you get his shiny black cowboy boot back out of your shiny little ass.......uuuuuuuuurgh!

15 Feb 2011

MACHINE BOY JAMIE aLive Improv mix on....

Machine Boy has been doing his aLive(LIVE) Improvisation especially for Gary Hunters NEW podcast/radio show....he's recorded a new LIVE mix of Jamie...as you've never heard it before! check out the link below to download the show...it includes a big bunch of great electronic arteeeests!...DOWNLOAD IT FREE FROM HERE!

13 Feb 2011

My Life As A Teenage Robot no5!

ok so apparently one day you'll understand!...but until then put your feet up, I'll make the tea and you watch f****n eastenders!

12 Feb 2011

FREE Machine Boy mp3!

A FREE mp3 from the new Machine Boy (aLive) EP called 'Village Machine' so if a LIVE bit of improvised Machine Boy electro'ism is your bag!....download it now!......ROK ON!

6 Feb 2011


Shazam by Machine Boy
Click the little bitty arrow next to the audio file to download!...enjoy!

5 Feb 2011

My Life As A Teenage Robot...is gettin political wew!

ok then more from the irrelavant world of 'My life as a teenage robot'.......yes I know I should be hung drawn & quartered for this one!...but hey on a lighter note whatever happened to that good ole 'take him down to be hung drawn & quartered'?........well maybe it would sort out our 'full to brimming' prison problems..........plus extra FREE meat products for cattle feed...yeh heart of serial killer...get a bit of that into our foodchain! shweeeet!.....and apparently its a right royal grungy mess afterwards too...erm....so I've heard!......yeh what a great idea....you know what, I should be 'Presidentey of THE WORLD'........... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...you gotta imagine me laughing kinda like Vincent Price!!....phew spooky....I told ya the machines will take over ONE DAY.....then you'll be sorry suckas!!....

30 Jan 2011

MY LIFE as a teenage robot 3!

ok then so little mini'Machine'Boy is becoming more aware....humanly speaking that is! he's learning from all the good people on our crabby planet!.....hey maybe he could become the new commentator for sky sports!.....oh s**t! he's just blown it!.......oh cheryl the way you flaunt your womanly charms and play with our ...blokey.....ahem.....erm...minds! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr U beeeetch!!!

29 Jan 2011

23 Jan 2011

My Life As A Teenage Robot tooooooooo!

ok then here's the latest 'My Life As A Teenage Robot' cartooooon....I have been told by my editorial staff (hehe ;-) at Machine Boy towers! my new cartoon strip can't just be used as a chance to slag off the bands that I HATE & DETEST!...........to which I said 'I can't even mention Oasis & UB40 then.....BOLLOX!......gggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! fascist bastards!'....


Action Figures (slam'phunk'mix) by machineboy

22 Jan 2011

GROOVE MAN out now!

Machine Boy & his old 'busker' chum A Man Called The Whistler, have a new 'whistle'tastic slice of good'wholesome'motr'musac in single form its new and its OUT NOW! oh yeh, its called 'Groove Man', available from all the TOP download stores such as Amazon, itunes, spotify, hmv, play, napster etc etc etc...


16 Jan 2011

NEW Machine Boy is on the weeklies!

wow so Machine Boy unleashes his latest socially aware piece of crap.....erm sorry!....we mean artwork on the universe & elsewhere with his new childishly created weekly cartoon called 'My life as a teenage robot!'.....ok granted this tosh will never grace the pages of any 'high quality' press (you know like The Sun or The Sunday Sport) but Machine Boy has promised he will be spicing it up now & then with some nude'titee and even getting a HOT bitch involved!......now that new washing machine his next door neighbour has just purchased....god damb it THAT IS HOT HOT HOT!